Self Defence & Gender

After being prompted to give my thoughts on gender separation in SD. I decided to sit down and think about it a little.

About two years ago, if you asked me my thoughts on the difference between Self Defence for guys and Self Defence for gals. I would have answered along the lines of ‘There is no such thing’. This is still true to an extent. At our core, on a physical level, we all defend ourselves the same way. Two arms, two legs, etc. With some minor differences. But as soon as I took the path of teaching self-defence to women. I had to ask myself, why have I not done so before? and why did I not invite females to the class I had been running already for years?

Although I teach the individual and not the generic. The generic is still a major issue of consideration. Why? Because generically male and female are very different, they face a whole different range of social and psychological issues. Take the training environment, for instance. Men tend to be far more aggressive in their approach as opposed to women. By that I mean they are, generically, more heavy-handed and keen to ‘prove themselves’. Women are naturally less aggressive. It’s a fact. One thing I do not intend to teach anyone is to alter their good nature in favour of a less pleasant one. Controlled aggression is the idea. Men and women tend to come at it from opposing sides of the spectrum when required to do so. Let’s not forget I am talking generic here.

Now, some of these issues could be dealt with in a good-sized, mixed class, no problem. Take systems like some modern Krav Maga that do it successfully worldwide. Where my division comes in is the social side of things. An online chum and author wrote a very good book that touches quite heavily on these issues: ‘How Not To Get Hit’ by Nathaniel Cooke. The female dynamic of the equation though, is something that is not touched upon quite so often. I have quite a good book on the subject, suitably titled ‘Self Defence For Women’ by Lavinia Soo-Warr. It is a great book that is applicable to both sexes in many places. But where it really deviates is, as I mentioned, the social side of things.

I am no author, so if you really want to read about this stuff, then I suggest you pick up the books I have mentioned.

There are many crossover situations when it comes to predatory types, and the defence against those people is pretty generic and applicable to both sexes. But much of what we deal with in SD comes from a social standpoint. By that, I mean it derives from a social situation. Bars, clubs, domestic, work and so on. The types of violence we face as men and as women(some folks have even experienced both) can be very different in social terms, and if you have a think about it, I am sure there is no need to explain some of the more obvious examples to you.

The approach towards them can be worlds apart in the training environment. Which is where my dilemma lay. The dilemma was a defining factor as to why I needed a separate class to guide women to full effectiveness in self-defence. Drawing out the lioness. To call the class ‘Anti-rape class’ would not be very PC, I suppose, but it did cut to the bone, which was one of the reasons I seriously considered it. Especially in a town where rape and domestic abuse is very high but kept really quiet for many reasons, some of them understandable. To the point where local help projects were very keen to talk but not to act. Which disappointed me as I really wanted to do good with the project. But that is the nature of the subject, unfortunately. Anyway, that is all I have to say on the subject for now, and I hope you found it remotely interesting.

Until next time, take care.